Your Nobody

In an Odd Old Way

2011-06-30T13:47:00.000-07:00

If I could.
Think
That is.
But I'm always thinking.
Everything matters
because they just do
Overwhelmingly.
Or because they really really don't.
And that matters too.
But you never relax.
But you never really think anything through.
So you're just stuck freaking out.
Not even gonna think about why.

Summertime has a lot of think.

2010-08-12T22:02:00.000-07:00

SCANNER FUN

2010-08-01T16:48:00.001-07:00

My camera is broken so I scanned my face....

Bang me.

2010-07-23T21:06:00.001-07:00

When has being sweet with me ever done any good?
You think you're being cute.
But it pisses me off.
Honest.

Dream Boys

2010-07-18T02:28:00.000-07:00

To The Other Side

2010-07-11T14:39:00.000-07:00

I produce cork from my pockets
Endless supplies
That people bypass
But it shuts them up
Blocks their tongues
and makes them breathe through their noses
Forces them to smell
what they've done
or die
I shove the cork in my eyes
The cork from my pockets
Endless supplies

2010-07-02T11:26:00.000-07:00

2010-06-28T13:10:00.000-07:00

Tea For Two

2010-06-26T23:04:00.000-07:00

Researcher

2010-06-26T12:59:00.000-07:00

You're a demon I can't find on the internet.
Or in the books I pile high
Trying to learn something.
I can't find you anywhere.
Not in any table of contents.
But I try.
Because you're what I want
And I have to find it.
The sinner like me.
The sodomite who makes it hard to breathe.
Debauchery brought forth by my beautiful epicene.

Waiting

2010-06-23T17:44:00.000-07:00

2010-06-14T19:55:00.000-07:00

Scraffiti paperrr

Grow

2010-06-05T13:32:00.001-07:00

2010-06-04T15:36:00.000-07:00

2010-06-04T13:13:00.000-07:00

Sleep

2010-06-03T13:58:00.001-07:00

Seperate but its still part of my Birth portfolio.

Birth

2010-06-03T13:41:00.000-07:00

I'm supposed to choose a focus for my portfolio next year.
So I turned out with.
Birth and Birth defects and growth.
And you know, Babies.
That sort of deal.

2010-05-27T20:28:00.000-07:00

We are like waves.

2010-05-25T18:37:00.000-07:00

We ARE like waves.
We hold our breath.
We move like that.
We move like the tide.
We climb and then let go.
We build and then we break.
We brace and then we crash.

Doing the Same Thing

2010-05-24T19:55:00.000-07:00

"When she's pressed
she will undress
and then she's boxing clever."

This is old.
Ish.
But I really like it.
I'm really good at drawing people naked with they're clothes on.
I hope you really look at it.
Because its not just a naked chick smoking a cigarette under a bunch of dirty words.
But that could also be exactly what it is.
I mean we're all smoking cigarettes under a bunch of dirty words eventually.

I think this explains my life.

2010-05-20T18:47:00.000-07:00

Thus far.
Why don't you extrappalate?

Get off my dick, bitch.

2010-05-17T17:36:00.000-07:00

Another Incubus

2010-05-17T17:13:00.000-07:00

I'm a pacifist. Seriously.

"Until Now."

2010-01-19T17:23:00.000-08:00

A watercolor painting/ colored pencil drawing of mine.
I'm exceptionally proud of it.

And this, I would like to mention, is my normal face:

Pickled Peaches

2010-01-02T09:16:00.000-08:00

Fireflies twinkled around us like fallen stars.
They fled from our touch
like fallen stars do.
They kissed our cheeks
like it is only a fallen stars will to do.
Silver glass skied our floor.
kisses carved our throats
until our hearts burst out
like arms stretched out
no need for breathes
just reach in
Hesitate a moment
and smile
and then you're bleeding
like arms stretched out
no need for breathes
just reach in

I remember being blue
Violet
Like your limbs
when your blood can't move
I remember being blue
and you were rain
beating like a heart
And the world;
the world was a fire
we put in a jar
on one of our many shelves
that
reached the sky
like a rocket of loneliness
I remember being blue
and you were rain
and fireflies did as fireflies do

Heaven's Apocolypse

2009-12-16T19:54:00.000-08:00

That steady falling feeling
When you close your eyes and start to dream
Slipping under farther
you forget to breathe
Filing forward
skin and skin
Filing forward
Just pretend
Buttons unbutton
Safely, but no
Buttons unbutton
Walls overthrown
Lips aren't lips
but what are they for?
Crying never helps
But makes you want more
I never found heaven's apocalypse
but plenty is ground
inside his barren lips
Hits of comfort
Hints of pain
One last breath I blew away

If I'm silenced.

2009-12-10T20:33:00.000-08:00

This one got given away to a hospital.

Pink Boy..

2009-12-08T16:52:00.000-08:00

I wish..
I were a boy
honestly
yeah.

2009-12-08T16:48:00.000-08:00

My favorite part of smoking (just about anything) is the importance of breathing.

Breathing....

I painted this early in the morning (or late at night) the sun was rising and I was painting. I painted several things that morning in a creative splurge, a week or two before school started I think?

Chased.

2009-12-08T16:45:00.000-08:00

I run into the public school restroom with my face in my hands.
I notice a spot on my shirt, from a nosebleed I had.

"There's blood on my shirt
Oh, darling
Oh, lover
There's blood on my shirt"

Bite me.

2009-12-05T21:37:00.000-08:00

In the middle of the night
more like the middle of the day
more like when school lets out.
Fingers turn into octopus tentacles
Lips turn into options
and tongues turn into crusaders
Fireflies don't happen
and pain
never really felt that good.
I said,
"I like it when you bite me."
he said
"I can tell."
It was like time wasn't there
and neither was I
Even though my head
never stopped moving
never stopped thinking
my head was always moving
up and down
and through
What should I do?
I said,
"I like it when you bite me."
he said
Nothing at all.
I was never really listening to him anyway.
I was staring up
up and down
at my feet
at the stairs
anywhere but his face
I never looked him in the face
I didn't want to know that a person's fingers
could suck the life out of people.
Just octopus tentacles.
Just things that didn't exist.

I sat down to write this poem and my nose started bleeding.
Maybe it was the force of me coming back to my body after all this was over.
It's just.....seven hours ago
I was something different.

Sharpie and colored pencils

2009-12-05T19:48:00.000-08:00

One of my favorite things I've ever done.

Mirrors

2009-08-21T17:31:00.001-07:00

"Reviens, je veux être avec toi. Je t'aime."

I wish I knew the notes.
I wish I knew where to put my fingers.
I wish I knew where to put my hands.
I wish I knew when to open my mouth.
And I wish I knew what to say.
I wish I could drown in a river of her.
And paint the sky dark grey
I wish that colors had no end
And if they did they'd lead me to you
And I could take your hand
And you could lead me home.
I wish that wars would never end.
Because they never began.
I wish that friends would just be friends
And never wonder why.
I wish that stories with super sad endings
could cry and cry and cry.
And when no one can read them any longer
They could have their choice to die.
I wish that souls could reinvent hearts,
Hearts and minds and eyes.
I wish that that could be all there is
Just hearts and minds and eyes.
Bodies not burning
Bodies not hurt
Bodies not in pain
All there is:
Hearts and minds
And eyes to see the rain.

"Veux-tu que je t'embrasse en crevant?"

That is-->Une heure moins le quart

2009-07-25T15:52:00.000-07:00

Sun was falling.
Hearts were calling.
But the sky still died.
And everyone cried.
And it wasn't all that bad.
Call me crazy
But I think you're all insane.
Call me Baby
And I'll end the world
and it'll still be the same.
He's the one that came with me.
to see if I was okay.
but when I told him I need to breathe
He actually backed away.
My heart was falling
and you were calling
but I still died
and nobody cried.
And it wasn't all that bad.
Call me crazy
But I think you're all insane.
Call me Baby
And I'll end the world
and it'll still be the same.

Bellhop 2008

2009-07-25T15:07:00.000-07:00

She tried to cover it up.
But I can see every pore on her face.
Sat on a smile
swimming in flowers and lace.
Drag me down
I'll bury you
like you always wanted me to.
I'll stretch your soul.
Fill in room for more.
Set it on the table by the bed.
"Cut me through"
but you'll sleep it off instead.
Say it's a phase
but you'll think it everyday.
She fell upon the bed,
flies inside her head
She flew into a web
but the spiders there
were kind of scared
for she was already dead.
Burn the corpse through
That's what you should do.
Feed the pieces to wandering geeses
And form a different view.
She is not alone.
The world is overgrown.
Stab first,
into me.
I'll tell you what I see...

The space behind your ear.

2009-07-09T19:45:00.000-07:00

I've always wanted to curl up there.
Tucked away behind your hair.
Where nothing can touch me
except your heartbeat.

Follow me.

2009-06-16T14:17:00.000-07:00

If you're lost,
don't follow me.
Into those golden waves.
Out into the sea.
Don't follow me
through transient memories.
Far beyond forever.
And past the place where
I led a whole field of roses out to play
and noone knew my name.
Stumbling about infinity,
You lost your heart.
and your whole trail of bread crumbs
got been picked apart.
Don't follow me.
Under fields and
through a tree.
To rest in the ocean
breathing the cool, cool breeze.
Drink the blue water
and feel at eeze
Through your bones
and down to your feet
Rest in the grassland.
Where you didn't follow me.

Follow that guy
to a better place I couldn't find.